Thoughts/Review (kinda) on Fastlane (2016)

wwe-160221-660x380

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS (Not that it matters at this point…)

I’m really late on this but you know what they say, better late than never! So WWE Fastlane has already happened and now everybody is looking forward to the spectacle that is WrestleMania, we already know that three matches have been booked. I’d say that Fastlane was ok, just slap bang average.

General thoughts on Fastlane:

What a stupid name. Bring back No Way Out!

Matches

Sasha Banks & Becky Lynch vs. Naomi & Tamina Snuka

Winner: Sasha Banks & Becky Lynch

I have to admit, I was surprised to see this match go on first because usually the first match in a pay-per-view gets the crowd excited and it’s not like WWE fans take to women very well. I can’t say that I was blown away by this match, I mean it was ok but there wasn’t anything to rave about. The four divas worked a decent match which is pretty much what most people ask for. Not to be lazy but, there’s not much I can say for this match, I’ll say that I would’ve liked to see more tension between Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch during the match though because it felt more like a feud between Banks and her former teammates which Lynch was awkwardly inserted into.

Watch or Skip: It’s worth a watch I’d say

Other thoughts: Is the rear view still a finish? I’m a huge fan of Naomi’s derriere but come on. I didn’t know that Naomi could kick repeatedly like that and I should have. How could Michael Cole be shocked with the fact that JBL knew his suplexes? He is aware that JBL was once a wrestler isn’t he? JBL really loves his sports references doesn’t he? The finish was interesting.

Kevin Owens (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler (Intercontinental Championship)

Winner: Kevin Owens

This match has been done a lot in WWE so at a ppv I already know what to expect from these two. The pace kept changing which allowed Owens to be methodical and slowly beat down on Ziggler but momentum would switch at the right time so that Dolph Ziggler could inject some energy into the match. I say this with a lot of matches but I could have seen this match on Raw but with that being said, some of the sequences in this match were impressive.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Kevin Owens’ comments are very funny. He told Dolph Ziggler to stop touching him… in a wrestling match. Owens telling Michael Cole to shut his mouth is what I wanted to say back when Cole used to tell everybody how to download the WWE app. The Irish whip that Owens gave Ziggler looked like it actually hurt. Kevin Owens could walk into his first WrestleMania as Intercontinental Champion; it’s been a good year for him.

The Wyatt Family vs. The Big Show, Ryback & Kane

Winner: The Big Show, Ryback & Kane

A match with six hoss’ in WWE is never expected to be interesting. I won’t say that the match was terrible because I slowly see the bigger wrestlers in WWE trying newer things and maybe if there was more of a story to the match I might dare say it could have been enjoyable. Slow matches have never been my style, it looked like momentum didn’t build up as well as it could have because with every tag there wasn’t too much life being injected into the match. There were a few interesting spots in the match but despite opting not to call this match terrible, I can’t say that I want to see it again anytime soon.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: The interesting spots were thanks to Luke Harper and in all honesty, there’s only so much that he can do to make a hoss match look good. Ryback does dropkicks? It might just be me but I’m sure that Bray Wyatt’s lamp is electric, I’m sure it’s been electric for a long time so why does he blow it out? (late observation).

Charlotte (c) vs. Brie Bella (Divas Championship)

Winner: Charlotte

Basically I didn’t pay attention to this match, I’m sure Brie did some things as a tribute to Nikki Bella and Daniel Bryan but everyone knew the reason for this match.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: How did Charlotte break out of the single leg crab?

Chris Jericho vs. AJ Styles

Winner: AJ Styles

These two have already had two good matches with each other so already it was expected that they’d put on a third good match. They didn’t disappoint, it doesn’t seem as if AJ Styles has been fully watered down by WWE (yet) and on top of that he works well with Jericho. They both had their turn to control the match and they threw out some good sequences as well (good sequences in more than one match at WWE!? WOW!). This match was done fairly well (match of the night) and I think that it wasn’t a bad way to handle Styles’ first feud. They both did well to show that the win was important to them and the handshake at the end was a nice touch.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: I thought WWE were trying to phase out the styles clash to be honest. Michael Cole said that Jericho countered the code breaker so the question has to be asked, which WWE does Michael Cole watch?

Cutting Edge Peep Show

Winner: Nobody (not even the fans)

Well this was a segment which had a lot of potential. Edge, Christian and the New Day are people that have provided laughs for the WWE and you don’t lose the ability to be funny. The segment started off well but the most significant points from it were the incredibly shameful plug for Edge and Christian’s show on the WWE Network which you can subscribe to for £9.99 and the New Day possibly turning face or into tweeners for a feud with the League of Nations.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts:  Xavier Woods made a Supa Hot Fire reference that the WWE Universe clearly didn’t understand. Big E telling Christian that no one cares about his match was funny. Edge’s Beyonce joke was meh at best but ‘I’ve never seen so much chocolate act so vanilla’ was a quotable. The ascension are low enough without Kofi Kingston having to rip on them.

giphy
My reaction to Edge’s Beyonce joke

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth

Winner: Curtis Axel

This was the selfie match and it served to further the Golden Truth angle that WWE have been doing for a while now. That’s it.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: Is the social outcasts’ thing to cut promos that people don’t understand because Bray Wyatt’s already doing an excellent job of that. This match is the selfie match because the camera caught a father and son taking a selfie as the match started and there will be no dispute. When is Golden Truth going to become a thing? R-Truth counting to four and being sarcastically congratulated by JBL was funny.

Roman Reigns vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner: Roman Reigns

I think the result of the match was pretty obvious from the start. The match was ok, I thought it was a little underwhelming. There was a huge chance to tell a story about how much Dean Ambrose wanted the Championship opportunity and how he was willing to throw away his friendship with Roman Reigns and it was told to an extent but not enough. Brock Lesnar looked strong but not as strong as he has in previous matches. I can’t say that there were any highlights in this match, it didn’t really drag on but there wasn’t much to get me on the edge of my seat.

Watch or Skip: Up to you

Other thought: Fans didn’t want Reigns to win which makes no sense because it was obvious that he was going to especially considering that he didn’t get a rematch after the Royal Rumble. The Spanish and English announce table both got destroyed, I’m expecting to see the German announce table fall at WrestleMania along with the other two. Ambrose trying to German Brock Lesnar was funny just due to how quickly Lesnar turned around to give him a belly to belly. The powerbomb isn’t the same without Seth Rollins. Roman Reigns continues to evolve into Super Reigns and Super Reigns comes equipped with invulnerability to chairs.

whatever
My reaction to Fastlane
Advertisements

Thoughts/review (kinda) on Royal Rumble (2016)

wwe_royal_rumble_2016_new_logo_wallpaper_by_alexc0bra-d9k31pd

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS!

The Road to WrestleMania is officially underway thanks to the Royal Rumble. Usually I’m really negative about WWE (just check my posts on them) but this time around, I can say that I’m satisfied, maybe even a little impressed at how WWE did the Royal Rumble. I reckon that the pay-per-view gave WWE some much needed momentum considering who is injured and it will be interesting to see if they fuck this up before WrestleMania.

General thoughts on the Royal Rumble:

The Royal Rumble is always one of the better ppvs in the WWE calendar because it has the Royal Rumble match which tells you who is going to “main event” WrestleMania (and who to boo). The past two Royal Rumble ppvs were huge fuck ups but that doesn’t take away from the excitement of the match since there are always returns, surprise entries, the annual Kofi Kingston spot and funny eliminations.

Matches

Dean Ambrose (c) vs. Kevin Owens (Intercontinental Championship)

Winner: Dean Ambrose

This was a last man standing match and it didn’t have JOHN CENA! Now that we’ve established that, I can say that this was a good match but that’s expected of these two. This match had me hooked especially when I reminded myself that the Intercontinental Championship was at stake. This match was surprisingly not super PG’ed up (it was PG’ed a little) like how WWE loves to do with matches and I think that really contributed to the quality of the match. Ambrose made Owens look strong, selling Owens’ hits well and struggling to get up but barely making it before the ten count whilst Owens was able to get up earlier. This match was probably one of the hardest hitting matches you’ll see for a while and that’s something that played well into the last man standing stipulation.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Holy shit chants really early into the match because it was probably the best match outside of the Royal Rumble match (I’m undecided). Kevin Owens taking a seat whilst Dean Ambrose was on the floor outside the ring was cheeky (love it!). Dean Ambrose and Kevin Owens definitely weren’t PG with their chair shots. Dean Ambrose punched a chair off Kevin Owens’ neck and for that he’s the shit! Michael Cole’s musical chairs comment was one of the best things I’ve heard him say in a long time.

The New Day (c) vs. The Usos (Tag Team Championship)

Winner: The New Day

Honestly I didn’t pay as much attention to this match as I should have and that’s because I’m bored of seeing the Usos in the WWE Tag Team Championship picture, doesn’t WWE know how to keep these guys relevant without having them compete for a title? They do it for Cena and Reigns and these two are basically the Cena and Reigns of that division. From what I remember of the match it was solid which is expected. I don’t really have much to say on this match in all honesty.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Xavier Woods once again proved why he was the star of The New Day making funny comments at ringside especially when he told one of the Usos that his brother’s soul had been taken and he was next. Despite everything that I said about the Usos, they’re further in my good books for dabbing during their entrance.

Uso dab!

Alberto Del Rio (c) vs. Kallisto (United States Championship)

Winner: Kallisto

So this feud is one that I find to be stupid. Two weeks ago, Kallisto won the US Championship off Alberto Del Rio and lost it one day after, just to win it back when the rematch could have just been had at the Royal Rumble with Kallisto retaining. My lack of investment in this feud led to me not paying too much attention to this match. I spotted a few botches in this match but that happens with Kallisto, since I cared least about this match I enjoyed it a lot less. There were some exciting moments in the match, it was by no means a terrible match but when you see a match for the same title with the same stipulation three times in two weeks, it’s very hard to care.

Watch: I guess you can watch it

Other thoughts: JBL’s comment on Kallisto looking up to everybody was funny. I’m not sure if the commentary team were trying to take shots at Rey Mysterio or not.

Charlotte (c) vs. Becky Lynch (Divas Championship)

Winner: Charlotte

I liked this match, I’m undecided on which match I enjoyed more out of this and the Intercontinental Championship match. Becky Lynch looked really good in this match and didn’t come out looking weaker thanks to Ric Flair interrupting on Charlotte’s behalf (as usual). It’s been happening for a while but this match really did help to show that women’s wrestling on the main roster can be entertaining fights rather than screaming and shaking. Needless to say, this match had me hooked, I didn’t care about the pacing, selling, story (even though I should have) because it’s been a while since WWE put on a divas match that I was fully into. Part of me really thought that Becky Lynch was going to walk out as the new Divas champion but it wasn’t disappointing that she didn’t win.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: It’ll be interesting to see how Sasha Banks fits into the storyline and how this will shape the Divas Championship picture for WrestleMania.

The Royal Rumble (One vs. All for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Winner: Triple H

Is there really much to say about the Royal Rumble? I don’t think so but there are definitely some things that have to be mentioned. My opinion is that Brock Lesnar is going to face Bray Wyatt at WrestleMania, it has to happen after the Wyatt Family eliminated him from the match. I enjoyed watching it, seeing AJ Styles make his debut on the main roster rather than going to NXT, seeing Big E help Kofi Kingston stay in the match (one day Kofi will win!), seeing R-Truth grab a ladder for some reason were just a few things I liked. I wasn’t disappointed by the ending of the match either, I didn’t think it made much sense but questioning WWE’s logic gets tiring so I’ll just wait for Roman Reigns vs. Triple H at WrestleMania.

Reaction

Me watching all of the surprises.

Watch or Skip: Always watch (even if the Rumble match is shit)

Other thoughts: I saw a lot of people claiming that Triple H’s win was predictable which makes me wonder how I was the only person that didn’t see it coming. I thought Reigns would be in the final two after the steady three year Royal Rumble progression but seeing him eliminated before then wasn’t bad. I’m wondering if there’s going to be a Kevin Owens/AJ Styles feud or Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn. Everything points to Roman Reigns having his WrestleMania moment but I’m not disappointed.

Clap of approval

My reaction to the Royal Rumble.

Messi wins Ballon d’Or…

Messi wins
How many captions can you think of for this?

After all of the hype, Lionel Messi took home his fifth Ballon d’Or last night and as you might have suspected, water is still wet. Enjoy your day everyone.

WWE Fans…

wwe_fans_royal_rumble_us_airways_center_phoenix
These guys…

Watching WWE’s product over the past few months has repeatedly driven home the fact that it’s not good and it’s going to be a while before it gets better. I’m probably not going to change my opinion on this because to me this is true, it’s damn true! I used to constantly blame Vince McMahon and the booking team for the mess that WWE is and to an extent they are still to blame but as I watch the product, I think the fans might be in a position where they have to shoulder more of the blame than the booking team.

There are definitely fans that know what they’re talking about like Rock Bottom Radio (you can catch them on Wednesdays at 8PM Radio lab 97.1FM to see what I’m talking about) but for every fan who knows the deal (which is rarer than you’d think) there are so many that pretend to know what they want. Last week on Monday Night Raw, Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch had a match in which they were allowed to wrestle only for the crowd to start chanting “this is boring!” and it didn’t make sense because the crowd had been chanting for Sasha Banks as she’s not been given much of a chance since joining the main roster. This is something that I’ve seen with fans for a while, they’ll chant for somebody and write on the internet about how certain people should be pushed and when WWE give these people a bit of a push, the fans stop caring. What is this nonsense? I can see that WWE has been put in a weird position because when they push Roman Reigns (someone that they want to push) he gets booed in favour of the wrestlers that the fans pretend to want.

It’s no surprise to see WWE pushing the wrestlers that they want to push over the ones the fans want pushed, if WWE paid more attention to the fans then it’d probably be a situation where everybody who wins a championship (the WWE World Heavyweight Championship in particular) would turn heel at some point due to the crowd turning on them.

I’m not saying that the crowd doesn’t have a right to cheer for whoever they want but if they were more solid in getting behind wrestlers (like how they were with CM Punk), there would be a chance that WWE would be more confident in pushing wrestlers that fans feel could entertain them and that would only leave the booking team to learn how to write feuds properly.

These are just my thoughts though, what do you think about the situation?

Thoughts/review (kinda) on Tables, Ladders & Chairs (2015)

TLC

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS!

Tables, Ladders and Chairs. The final pay-per-view of 2015 aired and I can say that it was better than Survivor Series (it usually is these days). I’m going to go ahead and say that I’m happy the ppv returned to Tables, Ladders and Chairs after last year’s stairs edition which involved a stairs match with two wrestlers that fans wish they could pay not to see. This ppv definitely had some interesting booking decisions which have slightly got me looking forward to WrestleMania (even if it is a few months away).

General thoughts on TLC:

This is another gimmick ppv however, every year there always manages to be something interesting which makes me more invested in a storyline and that’s more than I can say for most ppvs in the WWE calendar.

Matches

The New Day (c) vs. The Usos vs. The Lucha Dragons (Tag Team Championship)

Winner: The New Day

This was the spot match. From the minute that you see a match with The Usos, The Lucha Dragons and Kofi Kingston, you immediately know that this is the spot match. I didn’t have a problem with this match, if anything I’d say that this was the match that I enjoyed the most from the whole ppv. Once again, when you get these guys in a ring together, you know exactly what to expect, lots of moves from the top ropes, suicide dives, Big E doing something to look strong and all of that jazz. I don’t think that there’s too much to say on this match because it gave me what I expected. I’ll admit this last thing, I feel like I would have enjoyed the match more if this was my first WWE match in months.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Kofi Kingston only noticed at the ramp that Xavier Woods didn’t so some crazy shit with his hair. Aren’t they road buddies or am I looking too far into this? The New Day’s promos go nowhere but they do indeed rock. If The New Day put out an album on iTunes then I’ll buy it. WWE are shameless promotion shoguns, not only did they plug WWE 2K16 during the match but they also plugged Woods’ YouTube channel upupdowndown where they play WWE 2K16 (and other things). Kalisto’s Salida del sol to the Uso (I’m still not sure which one) was my favourite part of the match. When Kalisto started climbing the ladder and Michael Cole called him Sin Cara I asked myself ‘are you sure about that Mike?’ and speaking of commentary why was Xavier Woods better on commentary than the actual team? Xavier Woods showed why New Day rocks when he threw his trombone at Kalisto but here’s some food for thought. What if he missed?

Head done fucked up

How your head should feel trying to answer that last question.

Rusev vs. Ryback

Winner: Rusev

If you’ve watched Rusev and Ryback’s recent matches on WWE’s free programming then you basically watched their ppv match. This match was a bit longer than the matches that these two have had recently but pretty much the same things happened. Ryback smash, Rusev crush, Rusev rolls out of the ring, Ryback comes into some kind of contact with Lana. The biggest difference between this match and the ones that they had on TV was that this one got an ending.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: I didn’t expect much from this match, it’s ok but you’re not missing much by skipping it. I’m not sure if this is the case or just me but Lana isn’t as over as she was before getting injured. This match had no story and wasn’t even necessary.

Alberto Del Rio (c) vs. Jack Swagger (United States Championship)

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

This match was boring to me. Even the chairs in this match couldn’t save it and if I’m honest straight after the match finished, I forgot most of what happened. I’m not even sure which theme song Alberto Del Rio used to enter the ring. Before the match started, I already questioned why it needed to be a chairs match but I think that the worst part in this is that both Del Rio and Swagger can both give good matches. I guess that’s what happens when you have to tone down the wrestling and there’s no story to a match.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: Having Alberto Del Rio and Zeb Colter split before the match was definitely not the smartest thing that WWE could have been done. I guess Jack Swagger is off to the wilderness now until he’s needed to job to someone again (I could be wrong). I wonder if WWE are aware that when Michael Cole was reading out Colter’s tweet, they put up the wrong tweet. The crowd clearly weren’t invested in the match as the CM Punk chants will tell you. Del Rio really didn’t care to sell Swagger’s ankle lock even though it was applied with a chair, A CHAIR. How did the US Championship go from having John Cena and Seth Rollins putting out all the stops for it to this? WWE have underutilised Del Rio so much that I’m waiting for John Cena to come back and take the US Championship off him. In this era, the man makes the title instead of the opposite which is a shame. WHAT THE FUCK IS DEL RIO’S FINISHER!!?

The Wyatt Family vs. The Dudley Boyz, Tommy Dreamer and Rhyno

Winner: The Wyatt Family

I honestly didn’t think much of this elimination match. I tried to be interested but the two matches that came before this made it very hard for me to care about what was going on. I don’t want to talk shit and give an opinion on the quality of the match because admittedly, I didn’t really pay attention. If you were hoping for something then I apologise.

Watch or Skip: I don’t even know to be honest

Other thoughts: The fact that Erick Rowan was the only member of the Wyatt Family that got eliminated says a lot about who the least important member of the family is. The way that D-Von was eliminated made me laugh, I think it was the fact that Bray Wyatt kind of snuck up behind him and delivered the slam with so much force, it would have been complete it he said ‘get the fuck out of my ring!’ When Michael Cole said that the feud began the night after SummerSlam, which SummerSlam was he talking about? It definitely wasn’t this year’s one. The table that Erick Rowan barely touched did a botch all on its own, how amazing is that?

Kevin Owens (c) vs. Dean Ambrose (Intercontinental Championship)

Winner: Dean Ambrose

This match was solid and going by the wrestling that WWE tends to give its viewers outside of WrestleMania and SummerSlam regarding the Intercontinental championship, that is more than I could have asked for. Kevin Owens and Dean Ambrose are both solid workers who can put on a match that fans can invest in. I’d say that what really hurt this match was the lack of story going into it; every championship match that isn’t for the WWE World Heavyweight championship feels as if two wrestlers have been told they’ll be feuding for the title, it will come to a head at the ppv and that’s all that matters. It’s like there’s no indication that they should care what happens inbetween. I could go on about how feuds for championships deserve stories but I’ll say that from a pure wrestling perspective, this was my match of the night.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: WWE put Kevin Owens and Dean Ambrose in a feud that clearly deserved mic time, that was all they needed to do (rather than popcorn and soda) and the feud would have written itself but instead they didn’t. Jerry Lawler made a comment about people magazine, I don’t remember what it was but I know that it made me annoyed. Kevin Owens usually gives good promos but his promo before the match was awful, it fucking sucked.

My reaction to Kevin Owen’s promo.

Charlotte (c) vs. Paige (Divas Championship)

Winner: Charlotte

The match itself wasn’t anything special but it leaves a lot of questions. It’s very interesting to see how Charlotte and Paige’s feud develops from here and how Becky Lynch fits into the equation along with Team B.A.D. (mostly Sasha Banks) This match was better than the one that they had at Survivor Series even though there was less effort put into the build up, WWE just can’t get the balance can they? Like many matches at this ppv there isn’t too much to say on this one.

Watch or Skip: Watch for the questions it should make you ask

Other thoughts: Becky Lynch has been forgotten since Team PCB broke up which only confirms what Paige said about her. Ric Flair is too old to be doing spots, he chased after Paige to distract her and he was too slow to catch her. What was that with Team B.A.D wearing the wigs? WWE’s attempt to give them character isn’t working. Clearly. Is Charlotte a tweener or a heel, is Paige a tweener or a face because she works better as a heel. Charlotte’s theme song is one of the worst that I’ve ever heard.

Sheamus (c) vs. Roman Reigns (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Winner: Sheamus

I liked this match, despite what the crowd’s opinion was. These two went out  and completely beat each other up, I think there were only two matches in the ppv that were more brutal than this one. I felt that this match dragged on at times but for the most part this match was fun to watch and as usual Roman Reigns looked strong and resilient. For me, this was definitely one of the better matches on the ppv, before the ppv I believed that these two wouldn’t work a 20 minute match well but I was proven wrong. The one drawback of this match is that it looks as if it’s one step towards setting up another feud so it’s almost as if this match was unintentionally made into an afterthought.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Are WWE commentators allowed to reference UFC ppvs? I always thought that there was an unspoken rivalry between the two organisations. The crowd doesn’t respect Roman Reigns at all, first there were ‘we want Cena chants’ which was weird considering that Boston always boos Cena, then there were ‘we miss Rollins’ chants which was rude and then there were ‘NXT chants’, all of which made me shake my head. Were there always two referees in TLC matches? Did Sheamus sandbag Reigns or did Reigns genuinely struggle to lift him up? Where was Wade Barrett? Did I miss something? When Reigns lost, how did he have the kayfabe energy to attack the League of Nations and Triple H? Cena treatment. Why didn’t the Spanish announce table break the first time that HHH was slammed into it, that isn’t the Spanish announce table that I’ve come to know and love L. Is there a possible HHH vs. Reigns feud for WrestleMania in the works because Reigns destroyed him. The fans were absolute pricks during this match.

Final thoughts: Interesting ppv which has left me invested in the world title scene. Like the matches I can’t say too much but I can bash this ppv.

Thoughts/review (kinda) on Survivor Series (2015)

maxresdefault

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS AND DISAPPOINTMENT!

Survivor Series happened and to be honest, it was your typical modern Survivor Series. A pretty subpar pay-per-view which makes all wrestling fans question why it’s still one of the big four. TLC is on its way now and the bar hasn’t been raised high, not even moderately.

General thoughts on Survivor Series:

One of the matches that should really matter in this ppv means nothing, 10 people are thrown into an elimination tag match together and fans are expected to accept this just because it’s Survivor Series. This ppv never fails to disappoint, EVER. I’m still trying to figure out why this is, especially given that Survivor Series had one of the biggest events to occur in the history of WWE.

Matches

Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio (WWE World Heavyweight Championship tournament)

Winner: Roman Reigns

This match wasn’t bad but it wasn’t great either. Honestly, if this is what Roman Reigns and Alberto Del Rio are like in the ring together then WWE might want to stay away from this match up. I felt that this match dragged on at points, I understand that wrestlers need to sell moves but at the same time there needs to be a consistent pace and too much selling disturbs that.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: What was the point of the spot where Alberto had Roman Reigns in a tree of woe, ready for a stomp only to clearly miss? That’s really hard not to sell as a botch. WWE really doesn’t have anything planned for Alberto Del Rio do they?

Kevin Owens vs. Dean Ambrose (WWE World Heavyweight Championship tournament)

Winner: Dean Ambrose

There wasn’t really anything wrong with this match either. It happened and proceeded smoothly enough but my problem was that I feel that I could have watched an episode of Monday Night Raw and gotten the same match. There wasn’t anything new or inventive about this match and that’s what helps to make a ppv good. Both of these guys are good wrestlers, so that makes it even more disappointing that the match was the quality that it was. For me this was probably the best match as well, which says a lot about this ppv

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Jerry Lawler’s comment about Kevin Owens’ tattoo is honestly the best thing that I’ve heard him say in YEARS.

The Lucha Dragons, The Usos and Ryback vs. The New Day, Sheamus and King Barrett

Winner: The Lucha Dragons, The Usos and Ryback

So this was the annual Survivor Series elimination tag match that WWE pushed so much, that fans were on the edge of their seats for, featuring the 10 most over guys in the most intense storyline at the moment. If you read this thinking, ‘you can’t be serious’ well that’s exactly what I thought about this match. This was definitely meant to be the fun match that brings the crowd to life but I’m not sure that it did that, in fact I’m not even sure what to think of this match. WWE were definitely relying on The New Day to do something to make the match entertaining but you can’t just throw out an interesting team and expecting them to make uninteresting match interesting, the booking team should have at least tried with this match.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: Do 5 vs. 5 traditional Survivor Series tag matches even matter anymore? WWE did well to show that Sheamus had some fight in him before being beaten but in all honesty, Sheamus has needed intensity since he came back. What was going on with Xavier Woods’ hair? Why was The New Day’s theme playing during their promo? Where were they going with their promo? Sheamus’ input literally made me say come on mate. The New Day are heels but they’re relied on a hell of a lot by WWE to pump life into the crowd, something I’m sure that faces are meant to do.

Charlotte (c) vs. Paige (Divas Championship)

Winner: Charlotte

This match wasn’t memorable, in the slightest. I don’t know what happened here, both wrestlers were really off. The fact that they had a better rematch on raw makes this match seem even worse.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: The commentators really need to stop mentioning the divas revolution, it’s done and it kind of failed.

Tyler Breeze vs. Dolph Ziggler

Winner: Tyler Breeze

Watch or Skip: Skip

I have no idea what to think of this match, it was really short and we all know that it’s in a feud that nobody is invested in. I’m sure that Tyler Breeze is a great wrestler but he needs to drop this pretty boy stuff other it’ll become hard to take him seriously (well it already is). If not then he needs to go in another direction with it that doesn’t involve being so flamboyant.

Other thoughts: JBL said that Tyler Breeze would one day be a champion in WWE which was met by a heartfelt LOL from me. When did Tyler Breeze start using the unprettier?

The Brothers of Destruction vs. The Wyatt Family

Winner: The Brothers of Destruction

Watch or Skip: Skip

First things first, if you really thought that The Wyatt Family were going to win this match then shame on you, there was no chance in hell (see what I did there?) This match wasn’t very memorable to me so I’m just going to say it happened.

Other thoughts: I was pleased that the Spanish announce table didn’t survive. I know that Erick Rowan isn’t destined for much in WWE but to have him taken out of the match that early was a bit too much and it doesn’t look good on the Wyatt’s. Are we now meant to act like corporate Kane no longer exists? Undertaker 2 Bray Wyatt 0. WWE can’t keep building up Bray Wyatt only to have him lose the big matches, he may not need a title but he does need significant wins otherwise we’re looking at another Ryback situation.

Roman Reigns vs. Dean Ambrose (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Winner: Roman Reigns

Watch or Skip: It’s the main event so you might as well watch it.

This match felt a lot shorter than it should have been and it was the main event. It was an ok match but what really mattered was the aftermath. Reigns and Ambrose both did their jobs.

Other thoughts: I didn’t think tournament was hard to say but Michael Cole proved me wrong without even trying. Ambrose barely touched Reigns when he powerbombed him off the turnbuckle WTF? A lot of people saw Reigns or Ambrose making a heel turn which would have made no sense and it’s a good thing that none of them made the switch.

Roman Reigns (c) vs. Sheamus (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Winner: Sheamus

Watch or Skip: Watch, I guess

Sheamus cashed in his Money in the Bank briefcase and most people must have seen this coming. Now that it’s happened, let’s sit through it because Sheamus is only a transitional champion (I hope).

Other thoughts: WWE are trying to transfer the heat the Reigns has with the fans to Sheamus but they don’t realise that most people don’t want to see either man with the title, anyway let’s see how this goes. Michael Cole needs to stop saying outta nowhere for moves that aren’t the RKO. Triple H should have pedigreed Roman Reigns.

Survivor Series gif

 

How I would have booked these wrestlers (From Night of Champions to Hell in a Cell)

I’m always bitching about wrestling (well WWE) and how better booking decisions could be made at pretty much all times so you can guess what I’m going to write here. I’ll look at who was used on WWE television this month (Raw and SmackDown) and say what I think should be/should’ve been done with them.

Stardust & The Ascension

There really isn’t much going for these guys is there? Anytime that Stardust finds his way on to my TV screen I already think that he’s wasting my time but to be fair that isn’t his fault, he has a crappy gimmick and on top of that, what could have been a good feud between him and Goldust never got a conclusion. The Ascenion. I don’t know where to start with these guys, they were buried from the minute that they moved up to the main roster (thanks to JBL), the fans have never really warmed up to these guys despite the fact that they’re from NXT and for a while (maybe even still) they were looked at as a crappy version of the Legion of Doom. Now these guys are together and it looks as if Stardust is heading for a feud with Cesaro. I don’t know if that would be smart for Stardust, unless he’s not meant to look strong and I’m not sure what that would do for The Ascension. I reckon that putting these three in a trio isn’t a bad move as it has worked before with other teams, and it would be nice to see them go on a winning run on SmackDown, (since it’s not like any of them are ever going to be in the main event) this would definitely establish The Ascension in the tag team division (which is needed given the lack of star power there) and it would do wonders for stardust. A nice step would be having The Ascension attacking teams in tag team division as well as wrestlers that Stardust has problems with and occasionally top talents (imagine having The Ascension attacking Dean Ambrose because Stardust said so, it would increase SmackDown’s ratings). There’s power in numbers so I reckon that it would be a good shout to have those three as an established midcard team that can lose to others higher on the card without having their reputation damaged, plus I don’t think that they need mic time, those little pre-recorded match messages will do.

Bo Dallas

You might not agree with me here, but I think that Bo Dallas could honestly be a credible midcard heel, even so much that he should be in the Intercontinental Championship picture. At this point he’s just the average jobber, but he’s got such a good gimmick on him. He’s positive and insincere (like a certain tag team) which is annoying, because of this he should keep doing the bo-lieve promos but at the same time he should be facing people that the crowd expect him to lose against only for him to get the sneaky win and taunt the opponent by telling them that they didn’t bo-lieve. That could gain so much heat if it was the right opponent. The crowd would be more invested just so that they could watch him lose, he’s also the type of character that WWE could use to pull off a successful heel vs. heel match, especially if there’s a heel involved that WWE want to turn face.

Kevin Owens

It still early days (kind of) but at the moment he’s not doing anything with the Intercontinental Championship. As champion, Owens should be one of the main faces of SmackDown and constantly working good matches against other good in-ring workers to raise his stock. Every now and again he should be cutting promos on Raw teasing a title defence but then telling the crowd that if they want to see him badly then they have to catch him on SmackDown, there’s already a fan base for him and it’s hard to argue that he’s not heading to the top so why not give SmackDown some love as well. Owens’ mic skills are very underutilised which is a shame because having him speak for even 5mins would attract interest to his next move. He has a tendency to bully Rich Brennan and if that was translated to wrestlers on the roster with some backstage antics then there could be a very interesting feud on our hands. Owens feud with Ryback was such a wasted feud that I don’t actually care for what could have been done better.

Paige

There was a huge opportunity to develop her heel character which was completely missed (because the divas revolution was handled terribly). After Paige dropped the promo where she went off on everyone involved in the divas revolution I thought that an eventual title shot was needed. Paige then went back on her actions and Natalya got involved and this is where Paige should have feuded Natalya; whilst trying to get back in the good books of Charlotte and Becky Lynch, there should have been tag matches involving Natalya, Charlotte and Lynch in which Paige would support and “accidentally” sabotage Natalya. Natalya picks up on this which allows Paige to reveal her true colours and then have a pay-per-view match in which she puts Natalya out of action telling her that she got in the way of her plan before telling Charlotte that she’s next. If they weren’t going to go with that then they could have had Paige try to break up Charlotte and Becky Lynch by trying to buddy up with Charlotte and making Lynch feel left out, leading to Lynch telling Paige that she doesn’t trust her and the rest writes itself.

Cesaro

Make him one of the main faces of SmackDown and it will get views, then just allow him to have incredible matches and an organic following will come and from there he can challenge for a midcard title. I don’t see what’s so hard, he’s basically done most of the hard stuff.

John Cena

John Cena’s US open challenge could be a lot more. If someone challenged Cena and lost, only to be frustrated by it to the point that they kept interrupting open challenge matches until they got a rematch then that would be good. It adds more value to the US Championship which is needed because all the prestige is with John Cena at the moment not the title and it starts a rivalry too.

Sheamus

He is uninteresting and the Money in the Bank briefcase doesn’t help which is why I feel that a stipulation should be added to the briefcase. For every month that he doesn’t cash it in, then a random wrestler gets the chance to win it off him, if Sheamus was given mic time to talk about how he’d crush anyone who tried and it’s only a matter of time before he’s the world champion, it wouldn’t do much but it would be better than where he is now.

Kane

The demon Kane angle was interesting but the thing is that he should have still acted in a way that shows he takes orders from nobody. It seemed as if Stephanie McMahon still had control over him which took away from the character. I wouldn’t have had a problem if the feud went in a direction where Seth Rollins would see demon Kane backstage only for Seth to run to the Authority and see that corporate Kane is with Triple H and Stephanie. It was a chance for mind games which could have worked.

Thoughts/Review (kinda) on Hell in a Cell (2015)

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS!

The 2015 edition of Hell in a Cell is over and now the focus is going to be on the upcoming Survivor Series (which I’m not expecting much from). Staying on Hell in a Cell, this PPV was definitely more brutal than Night of Champions, I’d say that I enjoyed it more than I did NoC as well. I have to clap for WWE with the way that they handled particular events on this pay-per-view, the booking team showed me that there might be three (maybe four) brain cells between them.

General thoughts on HIAC:

Like NoC and many other PPVs in the calendar year, this event tends to lack that special PPV feel, it’s made worse by the fact that Hell in a Cell matches are only contested in this PPV making it feel like a gimmick PPV headlined by gimmick matches. WWE should think about removing this PPV from the calendar.

Matches

John Cena (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio (United States Championship)

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

After 14 months Alberto Del Rio made his return to WWE to take part in John Cena’s US open challenge and it was disappointing. The US open challenge has been one of the better things about WWE’s programming this year so when you put John Cena, who usually performs in big matches with Alberto Del Rio who’s a good wrester and the open challenge, it implies that there’s a match of the night contender on the books but not this time. The match never really seemed to get out of first gear, it didn’t have major problems but considering who was involved and the matches that these two have had in the past, it left a lot more to be desired. I get that Cena doesn’t tap out because he’s invincible but to have him lose to one of Del Rio’s standard superkicks was disappointing, there was really a chance to have Del Rio pull of something exciting.

My reaction to this match

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: Zeb Colter’s legs got injured (I think) on a previous episode of Raw but I thought it would have healed by now, it’s also good to know that he’s no longer a xenophobe and embraces America’s southern brothers. Where the hell was Ricardo Rodriguez? He’s the only person that can introduce Alberto Del Rio correctly. Maybe it was me but the reaction that Del Rio got during the match shows or at least implies that he wasn’t missed very much. WWE need to decide which of Del Rio’s themes they want to play, playing his 2nd theme after he wins matches and his 1st when he enters is annoying.

Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt

Winner: Roman Reigns

Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt stepped into the ring for what was to be their final encounter (until further notice) and they didn’t disappoint. For me, this was the match of the night because it played out so well. Reigns and Wyatt both looked strong in this match even though Reigns went to town on Wyatt for long periods of the match. The match did well to show two men that wanted to destroy each other by any means necessary as they utilised the cell, three tables and kendo stick after kendo stick. I’m not a fan of slow paced matches but this match showed that Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt are going to be huge deals in about three years time, they work very well together and they’ve both improved greatly since their main roster debuts.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: When the tables were brought out and it looked as if Roman Reigns was going to go through one, I thought ‘oh yes!’ in response to Michael Cole saying ‘oh no!’ Roman Reigns’ transition into the new John Cena continues (the crowd saying “let’s go Roman! Roman sucks”) however if Reigns is able to pull out more matches like this then even the smarkiest of smarks will have to appreciate his ability. I loved Reigns’ spear to Wyatt and I can’t explain why, it just fit perfectly. Wyatt looked extremely dangerous, having to go through three tables, get hit with kendo sticks and a spear before being pinned for the three count, WWE better not ruin this.

The New Day (c) vs. The Dudley Boyz (Tag Team Championship)

Winner: The New Day

This was a standard tag team match, it served as a nice cool down after Reigns and Wyatt’s match but there was still something on the line. I can’t say that it was as fun to watch as the match that the two teams had at NoC but it wasn’t bad. The match highlighted to me how well The New Day works as a trio because Xavier Woods’ antics were missed, hopefully he’ll be back soon. If there’s one thing that I want an explanation for from this match, I want to know what the hell that was when Bubba Ray Dudley had Kofi Kingston in position for a side slam and D-Von did a leg drop that had no effect.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: I feel the unicorn power of The New Day so shame on John Cena and The Dudley Boyz for taking Woods out of action. Kofi Kingston pulled an Eddie Guerrero and it was glorious however, what wasn’t glorious was that The New Day didn’t get to do ‘that thing.’ I didn’t expect The New Day to retain but I can’t complain about the fact that they did.

Charlotte (c) vs. Nikki Bella (Divas Championship)

Winner: Charlotte

This was better than their match at NoC but given everything that’s happening in the Divas division, this match has felt like an afterthought for weeks. As I’ve said before, I’m not a fan of slow paced matches but you can tell that both Nikki Bella and Charlotte were trying, given that two years ago women used to get in the ring and scream at each other whilst shaking each other (in other words, clearly not try) I have to give those two props. These two had a particular spot where Charlotte backflipped to avoid Nikki Bella’s superplex which was interesting and hopefully there will be more of those kinds of spots in women’s matches. The most interesting thing about this match was Paige’s attitude after Charlotte won, it looks like there might be a Paige vs. Becky Lynch feud on the books or at the very least she’s trying to systematically destroy team PCB.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Given how overrated Charlotte is, it would be nice to see her controlling matches, she can’t keep coming out with the win after spending little time in control of the match. I hope that WWE does something about Charlotte’s theme music, it’s shit.

Seth Rollins (c) vs. Kane (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Winner: Seth Rollins

This match was disappointing, not that it had much to live up to. Like the US championship match it didn’t get out of first gear but even looking at the match itself, fancy spots and broken tables couldn’t have saved this. Seth Rollins is one of the best wrestlers on the WWE roster however that is not helping to give his WWE World Heavyweight Championship reign life. There isn’t much else to say about this match.

Watch or Skip: Skip

Other thoughts: The Spanish announce table was spared and I was disappointed with that, by extension I was disappointed with that powerbomb that Rollins did on Kane. Seth Rollins’ next feud should be with the pedigree because the execution defeats him every time. Jerry Lawler was making jokes as he usually does and it’s upsetting that he doesn’t realise that he isn’t funny.

Me whenever Jerry Lawler tells a joke

Kevin Owens (c) vs. Ryback (Intercontinental Championship)

Winner: Kevin Owens

This match was so short, way too short! Title matches should never get the toilet break treatment and that’s exactly what this match was. Kevin Owens and Ryback have decent chemistry however that chemistry has done nothing to benefit the Intercontinental Championship. Once again the finish was weak and I’m hoping that WWE will start to take the Intercontinental Championship more seriously from this point.

Watch or Skip: Skip (For the fact that it’s too short to be invested in)

Other thoughts: Ryback has a feed me more chain, that can only mean one thing. Feed me more hoes!

Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker

Winner: Brock Lesnar

This match was brutal and it was so much better than their match at SummerSlam and WrestleMania XXX. These two (supposedly) made sure that it would be the last match between each other, using the cell, exposing the ring (when was the last time that happened!?) and generally just battering each other. This match was a very close contender for my match of the night and was just edged out because I was more invested in the feud between Reigns and Wyatt. This match definitely felt like a main event because Lesnar and taker did things that aren’t usually seen in WWE matches, it also made their feud feel more personal and showed that despite The Undertaker’s advanced age and body, he can still deliver. This was a very nice conclusion for Brock Lesnar’s go to hell tour and needless to say both men looked strong even if Brock Lesnar did resort to a low blow.

Watch or Skip: Watch

Other thoughts: Blood, so much blood! The Undertaker has worked THREE PPVs this year with two of those being matches against Brock Lesnar, I think I could be forgiven for thinking that that this was more of a death ritual than a match. I somehow don’t know if this will be the last encounter between these two since John Cena and The Rock were meant to have a once in a lifetime encounter that nearly came around three times. I felt that low blow that The Undertaker received, there was also a very nice chair shot to the face proving that WWE does know how to be hardcore with weapons. Lilian Garcia botched The Undertakers entrance which could have been awkward, luckily she stopped herself and started again a few seconds later. JBL said that only Andre the Giant and The Undertaker stand out as champions in WWE history, what about that vitamins dude who made shit tons of money from WCW? What happened after the match was amazing, not only did WWE make amends for Bray Wyatt’s unnecessary WrestleMania loss to The Undertaker, they took away from his earlier loss in the night which makes me think that WWE might have known what they were doing with Wyatt all along.

My reaction to the PPV

Wrestling is fake…

Whenever I say that I like wrestling, I get told that it’s fake and this is usually my internal reaction…

Everybody knows that the winner of a match is booked before the match even starts but I don’t really understand why that taints the view of wrestling. People will say things along the lines of “why do you watch it if you know who’s going to win?” (Even though the audience doesn’t know) and this makes me wonder why people don’t ask the same for films or stand-up, we all know that in films something dramatic always happens to the main character and we know that in stand-up, the jokes are rehearsed (the same jokes are told every stop of the tour). In a wrestling match, we don’t know the moves that are going to be executed, we don’t know how the win will happen but these things aren’t taken into account for whatever reason.

Before I go off into a completely different topic, the point is that, it shouldn’t matter if wrestling is fake or not (it isn’t) because wrestling, like any other sport is a good escape. The fact that a wrestling match is booked shows that you should be paying attention to what’s going on between the ropes and taking in the atmosphere as well as the spectacle. When I look at sports like football, there is a great atmosphere however it’s not possible to enjoy the atmosphere fully unless your side is winning, if your side loses a match then regardless of whether they played a great game or not, you’ll focus more on that negative. With wrestling, even if a fan favourite loses, since the result was booked we can appreciate the effort that they put into the match.

People don’t really take into account that wrestlers legitimately put their lives on the line for a “fake” sport; things like the death of Owen Hart, Edge’s broken neck, Triple H’s torn quad as well as the various concussions are the realities of what can happen once someone becomes a wrestler. Looking at the whole thing, the fact that the result is pre-booked shouldn’t be an issue for anybody because there are so many undesirable factors that the wrestlers are putting aside.

When I look at factors like the ones I’ve listed as well as other ones (like fixed match scandals in other sports) it fuels the internal reaction when people tell me that wrestling is fake.