A quick question for the fifth time

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I’ve had (another) weird thought for a while and I thought that I might as well ask it to see how what you guys think of it. When you’re doing a favour or a good deed, does the thought of karma come into your head and make you think twice about what you’re doing?

I like the principle of karma, or at least what I understand of it that what goes around comes around but sometimes this can creep up into my head and it gets me thinking. Sometimes I might find myself helping somebody carry their bags, returning lost property or something else that makes me do some moral shit but at certain times in my head a thought just pops up where I say to myself ‘yeah! The favour is going to be repaid someday.’ The weirdest thing is that those kind of thoughts aren’t in my head when I do the favour, at least I don’t think they are (they might be somewhere deep down if they come up straight after).

I know for a fact that I shouldn’t be thinking about how I’m going to be rewarded for the things that I do, it just feels like there’s something wrong about that. Don’t get it wrong, I’m not the greatest person on this earth (I’d love to say that I’m a pretty swell guy!) far from it but my moral compass works to a degree which is why I’m asking this question.

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Doesn’t he just look swell?

I guess at the end of the day we’re all self-interested in one way or another. I’ve legitimately met people who refuse to say please and thank you but get angry when you don’t say thank you to them for anything, which is crazy considering they’ll engineer a favour so that it benefits them more than it does others. We do have to look out for ourselves and make sure that we’re not getting screwed over when we do things. If I’m honest this is confusing to me because it has me questioning my own integrity at times. I reckon one day I’ll learn from this but at the same time it’s possible that I could get worse. I guess that’s something that I’ll have to see.

Before I get carried away, let me ask the question again. When you’re doing a favour or a good deed, does the thought of karma come into your head and make you think twice about what you’re doing? Do you reckon I’m thinking too much into this and I should just live my life or have you got some advice for me? I’d love to know.

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A feeling…

The other day I met up with a couple of friends and did friend stuff. During the meet up one of my friends showed me some of the beats he’d been making since he’s a producer and it gave me the weirdest feeling (even weirder than not having a laptop). This could technically be a music feels but I can’t find the song online; anyway, let me continue.

The beats had such a 90’s feel to them and it reminded me of the kind of beats you’d hear on an album from A Tribe Called Quest where they find a jazzy sample, add some drums and change it into something completely new. When I hear beats like this, they always give me such a warm feeling especially when the conditions are right.

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The sky was kind of like this and it really fit the mood

The beats made me realise that I’m around some people who could do some really powerful things in the future. That made me think even more and the truth is that it’s not just the people around me, it’s everybody, but I don’t know if people realise what they’re capable of (I don’t know if I realise what I’m capable of). In all honesty when I read blogs and I see the way that people write, I see that there’s a real talent behind it and I’d be happy to see people setting out to achieve everything that they want to with their blogs.

It seemed like I was going to talk about music but nope, music just helps me realise some important thing and one of those things is that everybody is powerful in their own way and I wish more success on everybody reading this (well everybody in general).

Shoutout to anime

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I’ve watched anime for a long time but as much thought as I’ve given to it, I’ve realised that I’ve not given any thought to it (if that’s makes any sense). Having read ‘10 reasons why it’s awesome to be an anime fan’ I realised that I’ve never given anime the shoutout that it deserves which is weird given that there are a lot of phases that I’ve been through and forgotten whilst anime has gone on to help form the person that I am today.

From before I knew what anime was, I was already watching it; shows like Dragon Ball Z, Pokemon and Beyblade formed huge parts of my childhood and even though I didn’t understand what was going on, there was always something about it that was appealing. A little while later I found what I would describe as my true gateway anime, Bleach. I could go on about how amazed I was by the art style and the fights but the truth is that it did way more than that, it made me open to watching Naruto and Reborn! From there the anime kept flooding in.

The first scene I was ever exposed to in Bleach:

During my schooldays, my friends and I would constantly talk about anime and it was honestly like we watched nothing else (come to think of it, on my sick days I’d just watch anime all day long). I can’t say that it’s always been plain sailing because there have been people in my life who have tried to make me feel pathetic for watching anime and for a while it worked. The thing is that as much as I tried to push it down I just couldn’t hide it, as if deep down I didn’t want to and I’m glad for that.

I do like to watch anime as a relaxation activity but at the same time, I’ve noticed that I’ve picked up mannerisms from shows that I’ve watched and whilst it’s not done anything for me socially, it’s still cool to notice that I pick these things up given that I don’t really tend to pick things up from shows. Anime has shown me that it can encourage critical thinking, something that I feel I’ve slightly benefitted from and I’m not sure how to explain it, but it’s taught me more about writing a story than anything else I’ve ever paid attention to. I’m someone who likes to imagine a lot of things and the way that I see some things, makes me realise that at my age, my imagination is still kind of wild and I love that; without anime I don’t think that would have been possible given that there are so many things that I see in my mind that I’m sure I’ve seen in anime.

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Me realising the influence that anime has on my thoughts

These days I can’t lie, I’m not the type of guy that makes it immediately obvious that I like anime (other anime fans are able to easily tell though) but I don’t feel like I need to because of what I know it’s done for me and what it will do for me in the future. One thing that I haven’t mentioned is the confidence that’s come from being comfortable with watching anime, it’s another thing that I can’t explain but an inner confidence has come from watching anime and knowing that one day I’ll be able to show to my children (when I have them of course).

I definitely have to give more shoutouts to anime, the ideas, the mannerisms and pretty much everything else that helps to form myself, especially my creative side would not exist without it!

Chronicles of no laptop 2

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It’s been 1281 days now (I think), I’ve honestly lost count. Every day is feeling the same which might be because I’m doing the same shit day in, day out. Where is life going? Where is this blog post going? Two pressing questions that nobody has the answers to.

Man, I don’t know how long this shit is going to last but the quicker it ends the better. Or maybe the longer it lasts the better? I don’t know what’s going on at all, everything feels like it’s paused so now I’m just here writing this post whilst doing The Rock’s eyebrow (or is it called the people’s eyebrow) at the screen. Do I even know what’s going on at the moment? I’m going to have to come back to this thought train at another time…

It’s still been 1218 days and well… I don’t know what to say. It’s actually pretty hard think of things to type up and it feels like I’ve got a time limit. If this was a riddle, I’d be chatting a lot of shit (or that would be the answer to it). Well, it’s come to this… Whatever that means? I haven’t even gotten as far in this thought train as I did in my other thought train and I already think I’ve got to shut it down…

the truth is that I don’t know how many days it’s been. I’m really not supposed to, all I know is that I’m meant to be planning ahead, that’s why I’ve got a job and shit. If I was truly moving forward would I be writing this blog post? I guess the answer to that is yes and no? It’s kind of hard to move forward when the one thing that was helping me make so much progress is stuck in the past and now I’m here wondering to myself why things aren’t moving as fast as they could. Man I need to stop this…

I’m not going to keep writing words that don’t mean anything. If you made sense out of anything that I wrote then I’m giving you a fistbump through the screen because I have no idea what any of that stuff means. This is what happens when I have no laptop and I’m so bored that I’ll write anything.

Even more music feels

It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these music feels blog posts and if I’m being honest, it’s because I’ve been a little scared. At the moment my playlist is full of just ignorant music, as in ignorant music topped up with some more ignorant music. It’s kind of weird that I’d be scared to post that kind of music given that a lot of my song of the week posts consisted of it.

I’m not sure what I’d do if I had this song on 24/7 but the plan is to be as successful as I want to be so that when I’m driving my car I can blast this at full volume. The song doesn’t make me feel any other way but then again I don’t think I’m meant to feel like an intellectual or anything listening to this.

A fourth quick question

Last time you caught me blogging (if you did) then you might have seen my rant (or kind of rant) about working but today I’m better and all of that good stuff. I have a (you guessed it, another) quick question. Do you think out your blog posts? Do you plan every little detail of your blog post or are you the fuck it! I’m gonna write type. I see this often on Twitter which is a completely different place to here and it looks as if some people actually think about what they’re going to tweet. Some people steal tweets and some even delete and repost tweets just because it didn’t get the reaction that they wanted the first time.

That stuff never really made sense to me in terms of social media accounts but with blogs it does make sense. Most likely because the way that I look at sites like Twitter and Instagram aren’t the same way that I look at wordpress and this is something that I’ve wrote about before. Moving on, it’s something that I’ve wondered for a little while and once again, I’m not sure why I didn’t ask this question earlier (this is going to become a running theme on this blog).

Personally, I’ve never really been one to think out blog posts. If I want to write something then I’ll write it. If I know what the subject that I want to write about is, then I have the main thought and write around that which is probably why my blog posts can seem as if they’re rambling on about God knows what (I’m grateful that everybody who reads still understands what I’m trying to say). I’ll admit that I do think out certain lines because I feel that they help to drive home my point but that’s as far as it goes. The thing about my writing is that when I try to structure it, I’ll always think of other things that I want to say and it just becomes a huge cluster of things and ultimately I end up scrapping it for something else.

With blogs, I assume that thinking out the blog post and planning it carefully before writing helps bloggers put their points forward in a clearer way but then again I can’t be too sure because I don’t do this. There are definitely a lot of different reasons as to why planning out blog posts works for some which I’m interested in finding out.

If you’re wondering why I’m wondering, it kind of goes back a post that I wrote a while back where I said that I wanted to master the universe and one of those ways is asking questions and understanding ways that people do things. It’s definitely going to be a long journey (that will take the rest of my life).

Are you like me in the sense that you just go with the flow or do you plan out your posts? Let me know in the comments.