Life is humbling

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You know what? Life is actually such a humbling experience. I know that I tend to write things everybody is aware of but it’s always good to be like an alarm on repeat with these things because they’re so easy to forget (and it feels as if I’m reminding myself). I feel myself in a position where it’s been so long since I’ve been put in my place that my perspective on things has been warped a little.

I’m someone who likes to do things on his own terms, even if it means that I won’t get tasks done. I’ve been protected doing the things I do which has helped lead to me absolutely hating being told what to do by others and finding it hard to abide by unwritten compromises as well. The thing is I’m rarely ever called out on these things so even though I know it’s not ok, my demeanour will show you something different because I don’t expect people to say anything about it.

Where is this coming from you might ask? Well, I went to a job interview last week however I ended up getting there around 5 minutes late and thanks to my lack of interview etiquette, I didn’t tell the interviewer that I was going to be late. What followed was around 10 minutes of the interviewer talking down to me about how he’d given me such a great opportunity that I’d basically thrown away (we’ll see about that) and something about how the company was rapidly expanding amongst a group of other points that really didn’t mean anything to me. I ended up being told to go away but from that experience a few things were pointed out to me.

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Realisation face

Looking at my CV, you could essentially describe me as someone who’s at the bottom of the barrel when it comes to experience and job prospects (I’d like to think I’m a nifty guy on a personal level!) which means that I more or less have to take any chance that’s given to me with both hands. I’ll admit that I don’t do that but every time I miss an opportunity that’s when life in its own twisted way reminds me of where I am and the humiliation process begins.

Usually I’m told by people to remember where I am in life and it becomes painfully obvious that I don’t have the freedom to express where I want to be. My experience usually comes into play and as insulting as it can feel, it forces me to stay grounded because it’s the truth.

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Me staring at truth

Everyone is capable of achieving great things but nobody’s special, even though we’re all unique and because of this we can’t get too ahead of ourselves. I was very pissed off with the interviewer because I thought he was unprofessional for talking down to me until I realised that it was unprofessional of me to come late without warning him; I felt entitled to a fair chance whilst ignoring the fact that if you present yourself in a certain way then that’s how people will receive and treat you. That day cut me down to size so much that the following interview I had, I arrived 40 minutes early (I didn’t get that job either which sucked though).

When it isn’t an outside source reminding me of what I have (or haven’t) done with myself then there’s always some unrest going on in my head constantly saying ‘Jeffrey you’re this and you’re that’ amongst some choice words. This is because I know that I have to do better even if my outwards attitude doesn’t show me as someone who thinks this way. I don’t always like the thoughts in my head and I reckon that’s because naturally as humans we all look for reasons to be confident and we love to shift the blame for our shortcomings on other people so that we can protect our egos and still have a reason to believe that we’re great.

In a position like mine (being an unemployed graduate), it’s very easy to get to a point where the sense of entitlement blows up without reason and keeping that entitlement in check is very hard to do because it just spews out unapologetically. I don’t think I’m better than anybody (I’ve seen people with toxic levels of entitlement who believe they’re God’s gift to earth) but I do tend to think that I deserve better than the things I’m offered rather than making the best out of it. It’s not to say that having a sense of entitlement is bad because everybody should know their worth but when it starts to change your attitude and hinder your progress, life will throw you somewhere that is shitty and make sure that you realise why you’re there.

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like this

One thing for sure is that nobody will hold our hands during life, in fact life is looking for reasons to push us over and it’s up to us to keep moving and not get caught up in the feelings that come with being knocked down. There are so many instances and truths that remind us of where we really are on a personal and professional level; it hurts but that’s how life is, at all times we’ve got to know ourselves fully and be willing to sometimes take L’s because life is always ready to dish out a lesson in humility.

Song of the week 18/7/16 – 24/7/16

My song this week is an honorary song of the week recommended by a friend of mine, it’s the first time I’ve done one of these but I had to put this song up, anyway enough of trying to make you guess what the song is; the song is ‘Addicted to My Ex’ by M-City Jr. The song might sound like a guy who’s missing his ex but it’s far from it, in fact it’s the complete opposite. This song more or describes what people might want to do to their ex’s but can’t out of the fear of still seeming interested (what a life).

Favourite line(s): ‘I brought her a gift, didn’t return it I took it right back from her, I ain’t gon never get back with her unless she suck me like Dracula, listen I’m telling you’

I’m sure you’ll add some more context because I’ve got nothing (sorry).

Recommendation on how/when to listen: Break up with your partner and see if this relates (or more sensibly when you’re feeling untouchable).

Chronicles of a lazy guy

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You know when you’re just so lazy at times, or to put it better when you’re just always lazy but the laziness is just completely stupid. I mean in the sense that you’re always tired even though the most exercise you do is scheming on new ways to do nothing all day. I’m still a guy who promotes being lazy but at times it can be something else completely (I really can’t describe it) but anyway I thought I’d tell some lazy stories.

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Let me get my mug whilst I tell you a story

So we have a lazy guy, let’s call him John. John agreed to meet up with a friend (you can decide what the name of the friend is) on a Sunday and this meeting was agreed two Sundays before, so John’s clearly got plenty of time to prepare himself (not that it requires any preparation), anyway John goes about his life doing the things you’d expect, whatsapping friends, going out to appointments, just general John things. The thing about John is that everything he’s done has been done with such little effort so in all honesty meeting up with his friend is definitely something that isn’t strenuous on him in any way whatsoever. The Sunday draws closer and thanks to John’s laziness he somehow feels increasingly tired with every day that passes. John literally spends the days leading up to Sunday in a sofa, laying horizontally, pretty much falling asleep at any time possible to (Lord knows why) and when the day comes, John gets a phone call from his multi-named friend. John, being John sleeps through the call and misses the appointment and somehow spends the rest of that Sunday being tired.

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John enjoyed his sleep though

Let me tell you another story. We’re going to name this guy John (again), John wanted to get a haircut because without a haircut it’s really hard to look good and the barber shop is only a few minutes away from John’s house. Since John is lazy, he typically spent the day lounging about in bed, he checked on the internet to see the time that the barber shop closed and it was 5pm. 5pm is late enough right? At that point in time, your day has definitely started and is close to winding down since it’s the later hours in the afternoon. John hadn’t started his day yet, as I said before, John had spent the day in bed literally doing nothing; in fact at 3pm John said ‘meh, I’ve got time.’ John is a funny guy because not only is he lazy, he also does things in slow motion so something that would take about 10 or 20 minutes takes John an hour to do. This doesn’t mean that John started getting ready at three because John is a guy who doesn’t really like to pay attention to his strengths and weaknesses, John is a guy who feels like if he does something at one point and fails then the result will be better the next time. Now with all of that being said, John sees that the shop is closing in an hour and you’d think that this is where he decides to get ready but nope. John sighs and says ‘fuck it… I’ll go tomorrow’ I mean given that John takes an hour to get ready that was probably a smart move but the only thing is that the next day that he went to the barbershop, it was a Saturday which meant that it was packed the fuck out so basically John held a huge L.

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This is how the barber shop might as well been

I’ll tell one last story today. Let’s not call this character John, let’s call him Jon instead, all you need to know about Jon is that he’s lazy (you could have probably guessed that) and he tries to stay still as long as he can especially on Sundays. Now Jon has spent the whole day doing nothing, even being too lazy to speak (I know). It’s weird because Jon is so lazy that he can’t even describe how lazy he’s been.

Also John and Jon are both me.

Song of the week 11/7/16 – 17/7/16

In all honesty, I almost didn’t do a song of the week. Why you might ask? Well that’s because I’m showing the songs that I’ve been listening to this week less love than the ones I’ve listened to in previous weeks. There is one song though, so song of the week is saved but moving on the song is ‘Cake and Bread’ by Treble Clef. This is another instrumental (you’ve always got to have time to appreciate instrumentals) and I’m not sure if it samples music from a video game or if it’s all made from scratch but the vgm sound is enough to make me appreciate it.

Favourite line(s): …

I don’t even know how to describe the vibe of this beat but you’ll definitely be able to feel something by listening to it so give it a listen and see what you think.

Recommendation on how/when to listen: I don’t know, you decide.

The Black Cat Blue Sea Award

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It turns out that I’ve been nominated for an award (YES! EVERYONE WHO SAID I COULDN’T ACHIEVE ANYTHING CAN S**K IT!) and of course I’m going to be humble about it.

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SUCK IT!

Before I go on, I should probably let you know what the award is (I should have probably done that at the start). I’ve been nominated for ‘The Black Cat Blue Sea Award’ which is for bloggers who strive to write for everybody and no matter how many viewers they get, make an impact on a reader. This award is an expression of gratitude to the nominee. It should be awarded to anybody that you choose deserves it doesn’t mean that they have hundreds of followers and likes. First off I’d like to thank Coolbeans4 for the nomination; I knew that wordpress had awards but to be honest, I’ve always thought that it’s just good to have a place where you can put your thoughts out. Things like this do make it rewarding because you can see those who may be thinking the same things as you or just genuinely interested in what you have to say.

Now that I’m done rambling, here are the rules:

  • Anybody nominated can nominate up to seven other bloggers
  • Anybody nominated answers the three questions
  • Create another three questions for your nominees

My answers:

Q. What’s your favourite meme and why?

Allahu Akbar. Easily the funniest meme I’ve come across and there are a lot of funny memes I’ve seen. I’ve got an odd sense of humour (or so I’m told) so I laugh at things that a lot of people might find offensive.

Q. What was the last thing/person/conversation you laughed at?

A video of Nick Diaz telling Ariel Helwani that where he’s from ‘people like that get slapped’, now let me give that some context. Everybody has started playing Pokémon Go but some people still resist the urge to play it. Somebody made a special video making it clear that people from their area don’t ever dare to play it.

Q. What’s the strangest thing you like to eat?

I don’t think I’ve ever eaten anything strange, I’ll probably think of the answer to this after I’ve posted this.

With all of that being said, my nominees are.

Cristian Mihai

Joseyphina’s World

Curious Queendom

Thoughtful Minds United

Aunt Beulah

Be Lifted

My questions are:

What is the one thing you want to achieve before you die? (Have you already achieved it? if so what was it?)

If you could have any power for 24 hours, what would it be and what would you do?

What is your most important life principle?

It’s not necessary that you respond to this but just know that I appreciate your blog (I appreciate every blog I read to be honest). For anybody that I’ve haven’t nominated that might have answers to these questions I’d still love to read them if you feel like sharing.

Song of the week 4/7/16 – 10/7/16

Sunday comes too quickly, I can just feel the days of my life passing by but this isn’t about how old I’m feeling or getting, it’s actually about the song of the week and this time I’ve chosen ‘Mystical Forest’ from Tekken 6. I wrote about how people shouldn’t sleep on vgm a while back yet I don’t show any love to music from games (or games posts on this blog) when so many that I’ve played have good soundtracks. From this point on you can expect to see more music from games as I’ll be listening to them more regularly.

Favourite line(s): …

This song is really peaceful and you have to appreciate the guitars. Well, when I think about it, everything in this song was just done right and if you’ve played Tekken 6 then you’ll know that the stage that accompanies this music is really nice to look at. There are some songs from Tekken 6 that will take a while to grow on you… if they grow on you (ones with yodelling specifically) but I can say that this song isn’t one of them, or at least I don’t think it should be.

Recommendation on how/when to listen: Whenever you’re calm or looking to get into vgm.

Xenophobia…

Ok. I’ve calmed down from the rant that I had in a previous post and I feel that I can write clearly. When I wrote about the EU referendum I was pissed off because I thought that the main reason Britain voted to leave was based on xenophobia and I still think that, having said that I have a few thoughts on the subject that I want to share.

The idea that you could dislike/hate someone based on their nationality has never made sense to me in the slightest. I mean let’s actually think about it, you have a problem with somebody because they were born in a different country?

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What the fuck is that?

As if that’s something that people have any kind of power over; people don’t say to their parents during development ‘Hey mum, give birth to me in Switzerland alright. Cool!’ It’s literally a circumstance that people are put in and sometimes to make the best of it the answer might be moving to another country for better opportunities.

In my opinion, there’s so much to gain from accepting people from other countries (acceptance of most things in general as long as they’re not bad). Taking in different cultures and gaining knowledge on different ways of life or even learning about a country from somebody who’s experienced it firsthand don’t seem like bad things to me. It also helps to make the society multicultural so it’s basically having some exposure to a foreign country whilst being in your own home (you can sample food, clothing, customs and add them to your way of life, what’s not to love?) Unfortunately there are misguided people (idiots) led by some unreasonable belief that countries should be kept pure (ignoring the possibility that some of their ancestors were immigrants).

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How people should be with each other

I won’t act like it doesn’t skew the population but at the same time it looks to me as if people really love to look at immigration with supreme tunnel vision. It’s as if some people really feel that they can tell me they’re fine with immigrants staying in their country of origin, having to deal with what may be crappy conditions just to keep them out. How can people honestly not see a problem with this?

For me I honestly feel like people should work together, cancers like xenophobia and racism keep us divided. They block us from having a greater understanding of each other, the words live and let live have never been more appropriate (especially when you see the fuckery that’s going on in America. It’s not xenophobia but it’s still unacceptable). I find it almost indescribable how stupid a reason xenophobia is to justify anything because it just causes unnecessary negativity and nobody needs that.

Everybody has their differences, it’s part of what makes us human but I think that it’s forgotten we’re all human at the end of the day. Take away the beliefs, nationalities, skin colour and physical appearances then we’re all the same.

Some of my core beliefs

A few days ago I read a great blog post by Janet on her blog Aunt Beulah which I highly recommend that you read (THE LINK IS HERE). She shared some of her core beliefs which I enjoyed reading and I found that I agreed with them as well because they really do promote a good quality of life. I have a few beliefs of my own that I’d like to share too, I’ll admit that sometimes I can slack with them but just generally these things that I think really help me through everyday life, especially those days where I get upset about things that I haven’t achieved (which happens more often then I’d like to admit).

Put things into perspective

One of my main beliefs is to always put everything into perspective, it really helps a lot when thoughts start rushing at you. I have a lot of phases where I ask myself why I haven’t done certain things and then I remind myself of my age before going on to compare myself to other people of the same age and the things that they’re doing; from there it just goes downhill for a short while. I try really hard not to get into my feelings about things by watching TED talks and constantly telling myself that life is a marathon not a sprint, it reminds me that I have time to achieve the things I want to achieve because when it comes to goals it’s not about when you achieve them, it’s just about making sure that you achieve them. This also helps me think straight because I’ve had people tell me what I should be doing with myself and these are usually things that I don’t care about but on the off chance that it is something I care about, I can ask myself if it’s a huge priority and if the person telling me what to do is relevant. Generally speaking, if you look at life with a brighter point of view you’ll find that it’s never the end of the world when you’re faced with a problem.

If it’s something you care about then do it to the best of your ability

Speaking of caring about things, I can’t say that there are a lot of things that I have really cared about in my life because I’m a guy that really likes to stay in his own bubble. I do pay attention to things but I don’t think much of them so I tend to coast (it’s pretty much how I got through education). This isn’t a great trait to have but for some reason I find it physically and mentally impossible to put my full effort into something that I don’t care about. When it comes to things that I do care about it’s the opposite. I’m always thinking and plotting on how to do better and if I could even be good enough to make a profit from it, with things I care about, I find that putting the effort is fun and because it’s something that could possibly contribute to my legacy, I want to do it justice. To put it simply, why not try your hardest if you’re doing something that you care about?

Laugh… A LOT

I like watching funny stuff, I don’t think I can remember the last time that I went a day without laughing. Laughing is a great for many reasons, it creates bonds, it makes you forget about bad things, when you’re bored it will cure it just to name a few. Laughing just sends good vibes and it can make people that you can’t stand bearable (although you shouldn’t be around those kind of people). There’s way too much to say about how much I value laughing but just know that it’s very important.

I have more but I think these have been the most relevant to me in recent times. What’s kept you going through life, values that you abide by that have really helped you?

Song of the week 28/6/16 -3/7/16

Ok, this time I’m back and there’ll be no cop outs like last week! My song is ‘Trumpet Boom’ by Treble Clef. It’s a grime instrumental and it’s so fucking catchy (I really had to swear), I’ve seen a couple of people dropping bars to this on Twitter and YouTube. Seeing that  brought out the instrumental even more for me. It’s got energy as well, something that I’m starting to appreciate more in tracks these days.

Favourite line(s): …

I don’t think I need to say much more other than to give the track a listen and see what you think.

Recommendation on how/when to listen: Probably in a car on your way to work, it might help you get through a Monday morning