We all have influences, from what I understand every human being is a weird mushy emotional compilation of their five closest friends (ok maybe not like that but you get what I’m saying here). We’re also influenced by our parents, things we watch on television and just all of the random crap that we see in our day to day lives which all help to mould us into the person that we become when it’s time to call it quits on life.
We all know that influences aren’t always good and that’s something that I’ve been thinking about recently. During my break from blogging, I took some time to think about what had me made want to stop because not too long before it I felt like I was on blogging fire. Long story short, it was a backlash of thoughts that resulted from shit influences (or a shit influence, not fully sure yet). In this case it’s probably better to refer to people because I feel like I’ve noticed something weird when it comes to what others can do you for and the effect that it will have on you.
People can positively influence others heavily without even being involved in their lives and I feel that this is common. Blogging is a great example for me, I read plenty of inspirational blog posts that make me want to do things that I don’t have the courage to do, there are also blog posts that make me want to embrace that inner otaku somewhere (but not too much before I forget about the rest of the world). People can also influence you by being around you and empowering you, luckily I find myself around people who make me feel as if I’ve got to do better for myself and for the sake of everything I want without even saying too much about it. These are the best influences, the ones who don’t speak too much on your business and have a positive aura. They influence you with their actions and somehow always make you feel as if you’re capable of doing the same.
There’s also a bad side to influences. In my experience I’ve found that people who try to force themselves on others thinking that they’ll help encourage growth (or whatever reason it is) are the worst kinds of influences. They’re not bad in the sense that they’ll make people open to committing crimes or things like that but rather that they try so hard to push an image on other people because they have an idea in their heads, so rather than helping someone to grow into the best version of themselves, they want to see that person become something that they’ve envisioned. This is toxic because people can’t be forced to do or be things that they don’t want to and some people legitimately don’t understand that.
Sometimes you’ll find that you’re criticised for not being what somebody else wants to you to be (which should be irrelevant to you at all times) but the nature of the criticism will have you asking questions of yourself. This is a shame because those type of people tend not to be comfortable with themselves and it’s as if they want the rest of the world to feel the same way. Sometimes they’re not even trying to help, they’re literally just looking for a bragging right.
An empowering song.
In all this, I find it weird because I’ve never been able to influence myself. I’ll think about things that I want but ultimately it’s not me that leads to me doing productive things (if that makes sense).
It’s weird that influences work in such a way, they build or break you. I haven’t really done a great job of explaining my point but I was hoping to say that people should be careful of what they let have a place in their lives, this is common sense but it’s something that’s so understated. The other point that I was hoping to make was that people should always be comfortable with themselves flaws and all because then influences won’t have the power stop them moving forward or sway them in an unnecessary direction.