A question on confidence

I always wonder about the concept of confidence. It’s pretty much needed to achieve anything in life and without it I guess you’re a shell of a person. Nothing comes your way without confidence or maybe I should say that without confidence your destiny isn’t in your own hands. I’m basically saying the obvious in the sense that confidence is necessary but even though that’s the truth, not everybody has it and natural confidence can be difficult to come by.

I’m not going to write a post about how to become more confident in yourself because Lord knows that I don’t have the answer to that; in fact, I’m more curious about the lack of confidence. I don’t know the science behind confidence (if there is any) which is probably why I’m confused by it so much. I’ve seen some people deal with their problems in different ways, some people fake their confidence but they fake it so much that it becomes arrogance and it doesn’t take much to see that the same insecurities are still there, others just sort out their problems by tackling them and at other times things just stay the same.

I can understand that being bullied, or having a bad upbringing can contribute to it but what happens if you’re not in that position? What happens when you haven’t been through any of that? I’m basically asking if you can lack confidence because you want to, is that a thing? There are situations where you can lack confidence and you’ve never been through anything really demoralising, I say this from experience and it makes me wonder.

There’s no valid reason for wanting to lack confidence in yourself but it seems like something that’s logical. Imagine being scared of a situation despite the fact that you’ve seen previous success (even if it is qualified), you’ve proven to yourself that you can tackle the problem so what exactly are you scared of?  This question has been on my mind for ages because I feel like it’s one of the worst scenarios in terms of confidence that someone can go through. It’s not an outside influence that puts you down but rather you put yourself down and even though you don’t want to feel down, it’s almost as if deep down you want to be put down.

I know that to tackle a situation, you need to want to tackle it otherwise it doesn’t go away, it just lingers and gets worse. Being worried shouldn’t be enough to stop you from doing something because if you really care, you’ll do it but for some reason it’s not as easy as that.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this rambling, I want to know your thoughts as well.

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4 thoughts on “A question on confidence

  1. I like when you say that some people seem arrogant when they try to hide their lack of confidence. I noticed that in some people and I was wondering if others can see it as well. ☺️ I believe that no matter how confident someone is there are times when insecurity kicks in and not necessarily because they had something going on in the past it’s just the fear of the unknown. Life is so unpredictable that you never know how things will turn out no matter how much you plan your life. You think that everything is under control and all of the sudden all your plans are turned upside down because life decides different. If this has ever happened to you that can trigger insecurity for something else that you planed. I’m no expert but I noticed that I lack confidence and I stres about things before they happen because I’m never sure where things might go.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’a a good point, not knowing what happens in the future is one of the most frustrating things. I think that the fear of not knowing what happens in the future can bring up bad experiences from the past which contributes to an even bigger lack of confidence.

      Liked by 1 person

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